Starring: Ice Cube, Anthony Anderson, Cedric the Entertainer, Sean Patrick Thomas, Eve

Directed by Tim Story

Produced by Robert Teitel, George Tillman, Mark Brown

Written by Mark Brown, Don D Scott

Distributed by MGM

Release Date: September 13, 2002 Nationwide.

Synopsis: Calvin (Ice Cube), who inherited a struggling barber shop on the south side of Chicago from his father, views the shop as nothing but a burden and a waste of his time. After selling the shop to a local loan shark, Calvin slowly begins to see his father's vision and legacy and struggles with the notion that he just sold it out. The shop is filled with an eclectic cast of characters that share their stories, jokes, trials and tribulations. Eddie (Cedric the Entertainer) is an old barber with strong opinions and no customers. Jimmy (Sean Patrick Thomas) is a highly educated barber with a superiority complex who can't stand Isaac (Troy Garity), the new white barber who just wants a shot at cutting some hair. Ricky is an ex-con with two strikes against him and is desperately trying to stay straight. Terri (Eve) is a hard-edged woman who can't seem to leave her two-timing boyfriend. Then there's Dinka, a fellow barber who is madly in love with Terri but doesn't get the time of day.

Starring: Laurence Fishburne, Derek Luke, Tyson Beckford, Lisa Bonet, Kadeem Hardison

Directed by Reggie Rock Bythewood, Gina Prince-Bythewood

Produced by Gina Prince-Bythewood, Stephanie Allain, Erwin Stoff

Written by Craig Fernandez, Reggie Rock Bythewood

Distributed by DreamWorks Pictures

Release Date: January 31st, 2003 (1,766 theaters).

Synopsis: “Biker Boyz” is an contemporary Western on wheels with desperados who live every day on the edge. Lawyers and city workers by day, they take to the streets in their leathers to race by night. In the world of underground motorcycle clubs, the undefeated racer known as Smoke (Laurence Fishburne) is the undisputed “King of Cali.” But Smoke’s dominance of the set is about to be threatened by a young motorcycle racing prodigy called Kid (Derek Luke), who is determined to win Smoke’s helmet and earn the coveted title.

Starring: Josh Hartnett, Tom Sizemore, Ewan McGregor, Sam Shepard, William Fichtner

Directed by Ridley Scott

Produced by Jerry Bruckheimer, Ridley Scott

Written by Ken Nolan

Distributed by Columbia Pictures

Release Date: December 28, 2001 LA/NY; January 18, 2002 Nationwide.

Synopsis: Black Hawk Down is director Ridley Scott's (Gladiator) adaptation of the "true" war story as told in Mark Bowden's book of the same title. The film takes place in 1993 when the U.S. sent special forces into Somalia. Using Black Hawk helicopters to lower the soldiers onto the ground, an attack by Somalian forces brings two of the helicopters down immediately. From there, the U.S. soldiers must struggle to regain their balance while enduring heavy gunfire.

Starring: Wesley Snipes, Kris Kristofferson, Tcheky Karyo, Daz Crawford, Luke Goss

Directed by Guillermo del Toro

Produced by Wesley Snipes, Peter Frankfurt, Victor McGauley

Written by Guillermo del Toro, David S. Goyer

Distributed by New Line Cinema

Release Date: Release Date: March 22, 2002 Nationwide

Starring Michael Moore, Marilyn Manson, George W. Bush, Dick Clark, Charlton Heston

Directed by Michael Moore

Produced by Michael Moore, Kathleen Glynn, Jim Czarnecki, Charles Bishop (II), Michael Donovan, Charles Bishop

Written by Michael Moore

Distributed by United Artists (picked up shortly after Moore's big win at Cannes)

Release Date: October 11th, 2002 (NY/LA)

Starring Taye Diggs, Sanaa Lathan, Mos Def, Queen Latifah, Nicole Ari Parker

Directed by Rick Famuyiwa

Produced by Peter Heller

Written by Michael Elliot, Rick Famuyiwa, Michael Elliott

Distributed by Fox Searchlight

Release Date: October 11th, 2002

Starring: Renee Zellweger, Catherine Zeta-Jones, Richard Gere, Christine Baranski, Queen Latifah

Directed by Rob Marshall

Produced by Marty Richards, Harvey Weinstein

Written by Bill Condon, Fred Ebb

Distributed by Miramax Films

Release Date: December 27th, 2002 (77 theaters in 22 cities).

Synopsis: It's the long-awaited film version of the Broadway hit. Set in the roaring 20's, this is the story of Chicago chorus girl Roxie Hart (Zellweger), who shoots her unfaithful lover (West). Landing in jail, she meets Velma Kelly (Zeta-Jones), another chorus girl and murderess, currently enjoying media attention and legal manipulation, care of her attorney, Billy Flynn (Gere), king of the old "Razzle Dazzle." Soon enough, however, Flynn takes Roxie's case as well, and Velma finds herself old news as Roxie is now the most famous murderess in town, on her way to getting out of jail and becoming a star. The two go through a series of attempts at getting what they both want (often conflicting): freedom and fame.

Starring: Samuel L Jackson, Ben Affleck, Toni Collette, Sydney Pollack, William Hurt

Directed by Roger Michell

Produced by Scott Rudin

Written by Michael Tolkin, Chap Taylor, Anthony Picharillo

Distributed by Paramount Pictures

Release Date: April 12, 2002 Nationwide.

Synopsis: An arrogant lawyer and a down-and-out businessman become involved in a minor traffic accident in Manhattan. As a result, the two men accidentally swap briefcases, the contents of which cause a heated battle with legal as well as financial repercussions.

Starring: Robert De Niro, Frances McDormand, James Franco, Eliza Dushku, William Forsythe

Directed by Michael Caton-Jones

Produced by Andrew Stevens, Brad Grey, Elie Samaha, Michael Caton-Jones, Matthew Baer

Written by Ken Hixon

Distributed by Warner Brothers

Release Date: September 6th, 2002.

Synopsis: New York City homicide detective Vincent LaMarca has forged a long and distinguished career in law enforcement, making a name for himself as a man intensely committed to his work. But on his latest case, the stakes are higher for Vincent - the suspect he's investigating is his own son, Joey. Vincent and Joey have been painfully estranged ever since Vincent divorced Joey's mother and left the decaying boardwalks of Long Beach, Long Island for the anonymity of Manhattan and a successful career with the NYPD. He lives his life in solitude, keeping his girlfriend at arm's length; the closest relationship he maintains is with his partner, Reg - and Vincent makes sure that friendship stops at the precinct door. As long as Vincent lives in the protection of the present, he doesn't have to deal with the pain of his past - or his sorrow over his broken relationship with Joey. But this murder investigation is drawing Vincent home to Long Beach, the self-proclaimed "City by the Sea," where the past has been waiting for him to return. The agonizing memory that has tortured him all his life - the death of his father, a convicted murderer who was executed when Vincent was just a boy - still plagues him. In the course of the investigation, he discovers that his own unresolved pain and failures as a father have deeply influenced Joey's life, and the destructive choices he has made. As a cop, Vincent must bring a criminal to justice; as a father he must find a way to save his son. Now he will put his life on the line in order to do right by both his family and his profession.

Starring: Pierce Brosnan, Halle Berry, Judi Dench, John Cleese, Rosamund Pike

Directed by Lee Tamahori

Produced by Michael G. Wilson, Barbara Broccoli

Written by Neal Purvis, Robert Wade

Distributed by MGM

Release Date: November 22, 2002

Synopsis: James Bond returns with the twentieth installment in the superspy series of adventures. From Hong Kong to Cuba to London, Bond circles the world in his quest to unmask a traitor and prevent a catastrophic war. On his way, he crosses paths with Jinx (Berry) and Miranda Frost (Pike), who will play vital roles in the adventure.

Starring Orlando Jones, Nick Cannon, Zoe Saldana, Candace Carey, Jason Weaver

Directed by Charles Stone III

Produced by Wendy Finerman, Jody Gurson, Jody Gerson, Tim Bourne, Timothy M Bourne

Written by Tina Chism, Tina Gordon Chism, Gina Prince-Blythewood, Shawn Schepps, Reginald Blythewood

Distributed by 20th Century Fox

Release Date: December 13th, 2002

Starring Eminem, Kim Basinger, Brittany Murphy, Mekhi Phifer, Eugene Byrd

Directed by Curtis Hanson

Produced by Curtis Hanson, Brian Grazer, Jimmy Iovine

Written by Scott Silver

Distributed by Universal Pictures

Release Date: November 8th, 2002

Synopsis: 8 MILE, a drama set against the 1995 hip-hop scene in Detroit, is about the boundaries that define our lives and a young man's struggle to find the strength and courage to transcend them.

Eyecalone Says: Overall: C+

In this movie 8 Mile is the area where Eminem grows up. It also symbolizes the separation between Black Detroit and the Whites suburbs, in a world of abandoned buildings, trailer parks, failed businesses, and failed people. Of course there is no examination or commentary about any of the social forces at work that have turned Detroit into such a desolate landscape, but I guess that should be expected - this is Hollywood, not sociology class. And since this is Hollywood there are couple of other things you should expect. The most predictable of them is that this a story of personal triumph against all odds. Like a modern day, musical Rocky we watch as Eminem, full of heart, determination, and grit pulls himself 'up by his bootstraps' and succeeds in a world of black discrimination and disrespect. You know this is a movie because in 8 Mile, black people are the only people who seem to have an issue with race, which is supremely ironic given the amount of undue publicity and promotion Eminem receives in real life, due to his race. You also know this is a movie because Detroit actually has an underground hip-hop seen, and Eminem reinvents himself as not only a guy who kicks a lot of black behind in fistfights but also an "anti-homophobe". Although somewhat pointless, overall this film isn't that bad. It's not a must see but for a "rap movie" it's pretty decent. Eminem's performance is also respectable (I guess it's easy to play yourself) and Kim Bassinger is excellent in the role of Eminem's broke down trailer mom.

Starring John Leguizamo, Denise Richards, Peter Sarsgaard, Sonia Braga, Isabella Rossellini

Directed by Franc Reyes

Produced by Daniel Bigel, Michael Mailer

Written by Franc Reyes

Distributed by Universal Pictures

Release Date: December 6th, 2002

Synopsis: Victor Rosa (John Leguizamo) is all about the mighty dollar and fashions himself as a businessman on par with Rockefeller, Carnegie, and Bill Gates. With an iron fist, he runs a successful "street pharmaceutical" business that peddles a heroin mix he has named Empire. His beautiful fiancée, Carmen, a Baruch College student, befriends a classmate with an investment-banker boyfriend, Jack Wimmer. Victor meets Jack, and they instantly connect. Both are hard-core businessmen from two different sides of the legal fence. When Jack offers Victor a piece of the action on the stock market, he sees his ticket out of the violent streets of the South Bronx and jumps at the opportunity. But there is a bigger price to be paid than clean money for his gorgeous new Soho lifestyle. For the first time, Victor is confronted with a price tag that he will find difficult to pay.

Ooh Papi Says: Overall: B-

The casting for this film is very good and believable. John Leguizamo is not the comical character people are accustomed to him playing; this time around he's a gangster. I didn’t think he could pull it off but he did an excellent job selling the role. Unfortunately, I been to jail before and made some observations. I noticed that it is often little guys like him who are the leaders of the street gangs and the jail gangs, so ignore those critics mentioning his lack of size as not believable because it is. Leguizamo also serves as a good narrator. As the film opens, Leguizamo discusses how each dealer sells a slightly different kind of heroin under a different colorful name, which is a double-entendre reference to the films title. It is a stretch to ask us to believe that he starts hanging out with one white guy and his wifey and almost overnight wants to dis all of his friends and join the world of the white elite. In the Latin community “mi familia” is everything so his abandonment is not realistic under the circumstances. The relationship with him and the wall street guy moves way too quick also, especially when their meeting is practically coincidental. I guess we can chalk that one up to Hollywood. Honorable mention goes to Denise Richards who is now a minority magnet, loving the Black and Brown flava as of late. Fat Joe's acting was good but the role wasn’t far from his rap persona. The range of Leguizamo’s acting skills are on display here, but outside of that it’s just a fast moving, gritty, gangster, action film. I love seeing Latinos on the big screen though, so I will be easy on this movie because its not damaging.

Starring Fidel Castro, Harry Belafonte, Angela Davis, Muhammad Ali, Alice Walker

Directed by Estela Bravo

Produced by Elizabeth Beer

Written by Estela Bravo

Distributed by First Run Features

Release Date: October 18th, 2002

Synopsis:A documentary focusing on the political impact Cuban leader Fidel Castro has on the world, going into his relationship with Che Guavara and others struggling for independence, such as Ho Chi Minh and Nelson Mandela.

Eyecalone Says: Overall: B-

Fidel Castro is one of the most controversial figures of the 20^th century. Few have the ability to inspire such a wide range of emotions in people. To many of the poor and people of color throughout the world, Castro stands as a symbol of defiance and the voice of the voiceless; to most of the powerful in the establishment and a small group of reactionary expatriates (mostly in Miami, Florida), Castro’s name is akin to the anti-Christ. Forty plus years as Cuba’s leader has drawn Castro more than his fair share of negative criticism from his detractors. Castro’s 44-year rule is not a desirable situation, but considering the Cuba’s adversarial situation with it’s superpower neighbor only 90 miles to the north, which has included direct and indirect warfare with Cuba including attempted overthrows, assassinations, and sabotage of Castro’s regime for it’s entire existence, it is not all that surprising either. In this documentary Estela Bravo, attempts to tackle the complexities of Castro the man but also his situation as the leader of Cuba. In the end Fidel ends up dealing more with Castro as a person (perhaps too much) and how he and Cuba have figured into and been effected by major events in the 20^th century from the initial overthrow of the U.S. backed dictator Fulgencio Batista, to the 1960’s Cuban missile Crisis to the collapse of the Soviet Union, and the irrational and cruel continuation of America’s economic embargo. The documentary is decidedly pro-Castro and pro-Cuba but with an American mainstream media that is so rabidly anti-Cuba and anti-Castro; it does have somewhat of a balancing effect. I think it would have been a stronger documentary if it dealt more with what Cuba has attempted to do with it’s social programs and obstacles that have been placed in front of this island nation, and then perhaps why these obstacles have been erected. Also the interview segments when prominent personalities are asked about their feelings about Castro would probably had been stronger if they focused more on people like Angela Davis versus Alice Walker. This is a limited engagement film. Click here to find show times in your area click here

Starring Ice Cube, Mike Epps, John Witherspoon, Don "D.C." Curry, Anna Maria Horsford

Directed by Marcus Raboy

Produced by Ice Cube, Matt Alvarez, Aaron Ray

Written by Ice Cube, DJ Pooh

Distributed by New Line Cinema

Release Date: November 22nd, 2002

Synopsis: The third installment in the successful Friday series, Friday After Next takes place during the Christmas season back in the old neighborhood where it all began. Although cousins Craig (Ice Cube) and Day-Day (Mike Epps) have left behind the security of living with their parents, the rundown apartment they now share is filled with all the accoutrements and spirit of the holiday season. Everything is idyllic…until a ghetto Santa Claus breaks in and steals their Christmas presents and anything else he can stuff into his sack, including the rent money hidden in their stereo speakers. Faced with the harsh reality of a Christmas without presents and the threat of eviction if rent is not paid by day's end, their only hope of scoring some quick cash leads them to the local strip mall where they land jobs as unarmed security guards. In the process, Craig and Day-Day learn some comic lessons about the true meaning of the holiday season.

Bruce Banter Says: Overall: D

I had to sneak into this film. I just couldn't imagine myself givin my money to New Line Cinema after seeing their disgraceful T.V. commercial with the word HO, as in HOE, graphically imposed over 3 different black women. It was supposed to be a subtle joke but it was not subtle or funny. Ice Cube was even embarrassed about this and said he didn't have anything to do with the awful marketing of the film and the commercial should be pulled off t.v, but he should be embarrassed by this film. I mean damn enough is enough already with the John Witherspoon on the toilet scene and all the grunting talk of the family members. This is like the 3rd Friday flic but 2 should have been the last. I mean if you have see one of these flics you know what all the characters do, but I can't front that Mike Epps guy is funny as hell in flashes although most of the humor is so ignorant it is embarrassing to laugh or even smirk at. I really hated the taste so good you smack your mother skit, to over the top for me. Everybody in these films, who is a regular is a coon of sorts and the images throughout are just poor. That is unusual even for a sequel comedy. The Ghetto fabulous crowd will love this film but simply put its not something that you pay to go see. If anything buy the bootleg. New Line Cinema doesn't respect you or your mother anyway - Nuff said!

Starring: Leonardo DiCaprio, Cameron Diaz, Daniel Day-Lewis, Liam Neeson, Henry Thomas

Directed by Martin Scorsese

Produced by Harvey Weinstein, Alberto Grimaldi, Martin Scorsese

Written by Ken Lonergan, Steven Zallian, Jay Cocks, Martin Scorsese, Kenneth Lonergan

Distributed by Miramax Films

Release Date: December 20th, 2002 (1,500 theaters).

Synopsis: Set in New York City, 1840-1863, a young man named Amsterdam (Leonardo DiCaprio) seeks vengeance against Bill "The Butcher" Poole (Daniel Day-Lewis), the man who killed his father. Though he secures the help of pickpocket Jenny Everdeane, the task at hand may be more dangerous than Amsterdam ever imagined when he realizes that his father was murdered as a result of gang warfare between the powerful Manhattan gangs. Amid the crooked cops and corrupt politicians of the Tammany Hall era, political enforcer Bill Poole stands out as only one scoundrel in the crime-plagued Five Points section of lower Manhattan in the early 1860s.

Goddess Oya Says: Overall: B-

This movie was alright. You’ll get a lot of action and a good performance from DiCaprio but for the life of me, I can’t figure out why people really like Cameron Diaz. Her mouth reminds me of a White Tisha Campbell except Tisha looks ten times better than her. Besides, remember the dumb dance she did in “Charlie’s Angels” where she was shakin’ her booty and supposedly showing how “cool” she was by dancing to Black music in a club full of Black people? Now, y’all know . . . At least in this movie she plays a pickpocket and a pretty good thief so when her and Leonardo hook up, it’s at least better than your typical love story from Hollywood. What makes this movie exceptional is the stellar acting job of Daniel Day-Lewis. That dude keeps the disheveled, misshapen demeanor of a classic villain and you should see the film for that portrayal, alone.

At the heart of this movie, though, is that it’s half-fact, half-fiction. It covers the infamous “Draft Riot of 1863,” where the Irish were pissed off at having to be drafted into the Civil War because they weren’t even accepted in America yet, they weren’t White (you know not all White folks were always White here, right?), they were competing with Black New Yorkers in the labor market and they were even more angry at the middle class and the wealthy because they could pay money to have someone go to war in their place. One day, they just lost it. We could have supported them in their protest but like all immigrants who ain’t White, the one thing they are always happy about is that they ain’t Black. Therefore, they took that shit out on us. You should read about it because they even broke into an orphanage and torched it & were lynching Black men in the streets, raping & harassing Black women. Like we really had something to do with the Civil War all like that. Like we asked them to be drafted. If you're in college, take a damn Black Studies course and you might learn something one of these days. IF you near a library pick up Root and Branch: African Americans in New York and East Jersey,1613-1863Graham Russell Hodges, Hardcover, October 1999 or New York City Draft Riots: Their Significance for American Society and Politics in the Age of the Civil War, Iver Bernstein, Hardcover, October 1989.Otherwise, type in "New York City Draft Riot of 1863" and get some good links.

Anyway, the problem with the movie is that they set up a fake personal vendetta between two gangs of people and then set that up against the backdrop of the riot. So, when the riot starts, they also show the two gangs fightin’ and then the riot takes a backseat, so you hear more about it on the radio and with voice-overs than actually peepin’ the reality of it. The cinematography is pretty good but overall, this movie is just “alright” but gets a better grade because of the villain and gets a minus for its lack of historical accuracy and puttin’ us on the backburner.

Starring: Morris Chestnut, Steven Seagal, Kurupt, Nia Peeples

Directed by Don Michael Paul

Produced by Elie Samaha, Uwe Schott, Alison Semenza, Andrew Stevens, Steven Seagal

Written by Don Michael Paul

Distributed by Columbia Pictures

Release Date: November 15, 2002

Synopsis: Criminal mastermind Donny/49er #1 (Morris Chestnut) has set in motion a plan to infiltrate a high tech prison in order to persuade a death row inmate to reveal the whereabouts of $200 million worth of gold. Undercover FBI agent Sascha (Steven Seagal) must stop him before it’s too late.

Bruce Banter Says: Overall: C

Steven Segal is grey-haired & fat as a mutha in this film. He has a beer belly and to watch him kick ass and make swift cat like movements is no longer believable. Baby Tupac aka Ja-Rule gets his ass kicked all throughout this film (even by a female) and tries to teach Segal a lil ebonics, mainly how to enuciate the phrase aiight., but its not aaight because Segal and Ja-Rule don't have good on screen chemistry. What's equally weird is that Ja-Rule's actions scenes are blasting DMX songs and they have beef. Morris Chessnut and his evil sidekick female are much more interesting and Kurrupt is surprisingly decent as the typical comedy relief role, in fact his closing role with MoNique (Parkers) officially makes this movie half action film and half comedy. Most of the stuff, in this film you can see coming a mile away but ironically viewers won't get to see Segal take down the initial bad guy who the film opens with and who Segal's character has dedicated his life to bringing down because he killed his wife. He doesn't even kill Chessnut the main bad guy, he just does every other unbelievable 2 hand machine gun totting stunt as most action heroes do. It's amazing that with all the explosions and thousands of rounds of ammo fired back and forth in exchanges only like three people die. I thought I was watching The A Team. Take away Ja-Rule and Segal and the film might actually be ok. - Nuff said

Starring: Al Pacino, Hilary Swank, Robin Williams, Martin Donovan, Nicky Katt

Directed by Christopher Nolan

Produced by Edward L. McDonnell, Andrew A. Kosove, Broderick Johnson, Paul Junger Witt

Written by Hillary Seitz

Distributed by Warner Brothers

Release Date: May 24, 2002 Nationwide

Synopsis: A sleep-deprived detective is sent to a small Alaskan town to investigate the murder of a teenage girl. Forced into a psychological game of cat-and-mouse by the primary suspect, events escalate and the detective finds his own stability dangerously threatened.

Eyecalone Says: Overall: B+

It's a shame I didn't see this film the day it came out, but it's been a hectic summer and spring for movies. With the advertising demands of blockbusters like Spider-Man, Star Wars Episode II, and Sum of All Fears (just to name a few), films like this tend to fall through the cracks. I was originally intrigued by this film because of the possibility of seeing "funnyman", Robin Williams play a psycho, but as it would turn out his character was a lot less crazy and a lot more complex than that. Before I go any further though let me give a little background on this film; it's a remake of a Norwegian film of the same name, made in 1998 by Erik Skjoldbjaerg - but I don't think our Norwegian readership is that large so it's a new movie to us. There are also major twist in the plot that I don't want to ruin for you so I will have to be vague about the films content. But I will say this much, the storyline, acting, layout, and pace of this film are all well done, and you probably won't be bored unless you're an adolescent or one of those adults who doesn't understand anything but explosions. The only small drawback in the film was that I found some of the plot twist a little predictable. Al Pacino's on screen bout with his past, his conscious, and 6 months of Alaskan daylight leave him haggard and put his ethics under the microscope as he eventually finds himself strange bedfellows with a killer.

Starring: Denzel Washington, Robert Duvall, Anne Heche, James Woods, Eddie Griffin

Directed by Nick Cassavetes

Produced by Mark Burg, Oren Koules

Written by James Kearns

Distributed by New Line Cinema

Release Date: February 15, 2002 Nationwide

Synopsis: John Q. Archibald is an ordinary man who works at a factory and takes care of his family. His wife Denise and young son Michael are his world. But when Michael falls seriously ill and needs an emergency heart transplant operation that John Q. can't afford and his health insurance won't cover, he vows to do whatever it will take to keep his son alive. With time and options running out, a desperate gamble becomes his only hope- he takes the emergency room hostage. As John Q. barricades himself inside the hospital along with his unwitting group of emergency room hostages, many of them in need of medical care themselves, he faces off with a veteran police hostage negotiator and a quick-tempered police chief who wants to bring a swift end to the stand-off.

Ooh Papi Says: Overall: A

John Q is a remarkable movie on the state of American Health care, too bad this movie did not come out before the last Presidential election. Gore and Bush might have made a promise to do something about it. 40 Million Americans without Health care is a fucking embarrassment and a farce on the idea that this is the richest nation cliché. Think about that 40 Million people without, that's more people without health care than people who live in Puerto Rico. That is bigger than many countries, imagine a country where nobody has healthcare. Denzel should get a Academy award for this film but he wont because he never gets nods for the films he should like, Hurricane. Instead they nominate him for Training Day which entertains thoroughly, but it's the type of flawed film that rarely gets an Academy award nod and (we shall see in 2 weeks) in addition his villainous character is so rare a role for him its almost like saying okay, 'only negative and subservient roles for minorities males are acceptable'. The little kid is actually an awesome new talent who has a really memorable role. This film is a real "tearjerker" it might make you cry or at least swell up in the eyes. It is kind of funny at times and an emotional roller coaster. I was able to take my family and enjoy the day. Just think John Q is prepared to give his life for his son's life in an era where the typical black male image is one who wont even give up a child support payment. For those of us with families and kids, John Q this is that John Blaze! The only thing that I didnt like was coming near the end, when John Q was about to ????? (can't spoil the plot) he tells his son "don't be stupid like me, sell out for money if you have to, it will make your life easier", I think that's a direct quote but go see it and make sure. It doesn't replace Die Hard as my all time favorite but it's sure to remain my name #1 film for 2002. Don't email me about it cause I am sure to give away the plot.

Starring: Jennifer Lopez, Ralph Fiennes, Natasha Richardson, Di Quon, Kevin Wade

Directed by Wayne Wang

Produced by John Hughes, Elaine Goldsmith-Thomas, Joe Roth, Julia Roberts

Written by John Hughes

Distributed by Columbia Pictures

Release Date: December 13th, 2002

Synopsis: Jennifer Lopez is Marisa Ventura, a street savvy, independent single mother who lives in the Bronx with her son, Ty, and works as a maid in a first class Manhattan hotel. Marisa dreams of a better life but has learned to depend upon her own wits to get her there. Enter Christopher Hall, a handsome, debonair heir to an American political dynasty. Chris is in New York for a week of glad-handing with party big shots and is staying in the hotel where Marisa works. By a twist of fate and mistaken identity, the two meet. Marisa soon finds herself gaining insight into the life of a man she might otherwise have judged from a distance. When her true identity is revealed, however, the truth sets in as to the disparity in their lives.

Ooh Papi Says: Overall: C

Jennifer Lopez in a film, which has a theme that you should treat all people the same. Can you spell I R O N Y? The key line in the film that teaches the audience is “just because you serve people does not make you a servant”. All the reports I read say that J.Lo is a self-absorbed prima Donna who thinks everybody who has less wealth than her is there to serve her. I don’t know her personally but I believe it is true. Also how ironic is it that the film pits her back in the Bronx as a poor Latino, I guess that is why she had to make the song "Jenny from the Block" to assuage her return to the hood although she received no love upon return. People realize she is phony. All the dialogue in the film communicates an infatuation with money, legacy, and how awesome it is that a rich man desires a poor woman - basically chickenhead talk, as Bruce Banter might say. This film is a love story whereby a white Republican playboy Senator falls in love with a poor lowly Boricua from the Bronx who has a 10-year-old son who is captivated by some of the worst politicians in history. Guys like him do love Latin women, but they access them by going to poor islands like Cuba, Dominican Republic, or my island of Puerto Rico, and pay for the sex. He can easily sleep with younger, sexier, prettier girls with less baggage than J- Lo ( a maid) anytime he wants. So to sell this dream to the American Public was a waste of my time. I think everybody knows better but some people may be that gullible. Although the film makes it like he has was so captivated because he never heard a slightly outspoken Puerto Rican female. Give me a break the guy is running for office in New York which has a Puerto Rican population almost equal to Puerto Rico! What a bullcrap fantasy, but if Mr. Senator can be captivated simply by an outspoken Puerto Rican then he should meet my sister.

Bruce Banner Says: Overall: C

All I can say is that the dog steals the show in this movie. The dog is absolutely hilarious and overshadows all of the new aliens in the film. The costumes and special effects of this film are highlighted too briefly as are the cameo's by music icons Michael Jackson and the legendary Bizmarkie, who both look like real aliens, without makeup. However they brought some laughs and flava to an otherwise simplistic plot. This film is barely 90 minutes and the soundtrack is not as tight as its predecessor, its also a short film which leaves you feeling somewhat cheated after all the hype to market this movie. The love plot is weak and overall Smith and Tommy Lee Jones seem very UNINSPIRED to do this. I don't want to act spoiled and be unappreciative of the costume and effects in the movie, so I will be generous in my grading. I should have waited to see this and I can almost GUARANTEE YOU, will feel the same way. This is one of the weakest sequels to come along after so much hype.

Eyecalone Says: Overall: B+

After that A.I. mess, this is a nice rebound for Mr. Spielberg. When I first saw the previews it appeared that the special effects and action sequences would be an attempt to "steal the thunder" from next year's Matrix sequel but as it turns out, Tom Cruise is far from your typical kick-ass action hero. In fact he's pretty regular in the film; no special fighting skills or anything like that (plus he has a drug problem), just a guy on the run from a system he helped create. A system that imprisons people before they have actually done anything (only in cases of murder) and also a system that has had the truth of its' flaws suppressed by it's creators. As should be expected, the special effects were great but not overdone, and being the movie is set approximately 50 years in the future some of the things you witness are quite eerie considering the Orwellian direction American society is heading in. Although the movie does a poor job of indicating what is going on in the rest of the country or at different levels of the society, in Washington, D.C. seemingly everything is run based on eye scanning technology which is apparently hooked up to a vast computer network giving an individual's location at any time - and it's not voluntary! You can't so much as ride the Metro (D.C. mass transit) without getting your eye scanned and there is virtually no privacy. In addition it seems the "free market" has really run amuck as ads literally jump out at you, using automatic eye scan technology to personalize advertisements to a person's past purchases and buying preferences (FYI-won't be able to miss the product placements by companies like Lexus and The Gap). Another theme I noticed in the movie was despite the new technology and seemingly lite police presence, very little has changed in the society. In fact, it seems the "advances" have been used simply to entrench old habits, as crime is apparently still dealt with at the punishment level instead of prevention. People convicted of "Pre-murder" are locked away in a mechanically induced vegetative state, without trial of course, and with no apparent mention of a possible release. Fortunately the "Precrime" system has not yet gone National and it is Cruise's fight to rewrite his future that will decide whether it does. One thing I did find annoying about the film is that at times (near the end) the dialogue in the film is such that it's almost like the director is trying to explain the film to you - as if you're some sort of imbecile - but overall it was a strong film and a fun ride.

Eyecalone Says: Overall: C+

I can't quite figure out what it was, but something was missing from this movie. The are a number of things I can't discuss here for the sake of not giving the films ending away, but overall it was solid and the storyline was decent. It just wasn't nearly as thrilling as I expected. Perhaps it was because the story was told in reverse, starting at the end where Robin Williams' character, Sy Parrish, has already been apprehended by police or it could be that the film's ending is somewhat anticlimactic. Where One Hour Photo does succeed is in it's use of cinematography and colors to set a sterile and cold mood to the film. The director also does a good job by not turning Robin Williams character into a complete monster; in a lot of ways he is pretty regular. The way the film deals with the misery of being alone and the importance of photos and is also interesting. If you plan on leaving the theater feeling charged and excited then I wouldn't recommend this movie but if you like movies that are slightly cerebral and open to interpretation then you may want to give this a chance.

Category: Crime/Gangster and Drama

Rating: R for (for violence, pervasive language, some strong sexuality and drug content).

Run Time: 1 hr. 33 min.

Bruce Banter Says: Overall: C+

This film is based on a true story that I am very familiar with. I live in Philly now, But I was born and raised in NYC & you couldn't help but know of the 3, Ghetto Superstars Alpo, AZ, and Rich Porter. These young guys were getting a whole lot of money. We talking millions. No urban drug dealers in America are getting money today like they were getting back in the 80's. The laws done changed and you can't walk in to a car dealership with 75,000 cash in a paper bag and say give me those 2 convertibles Porsche's right there. That is why young, misguided youth all try to get into the fast life using rap cause despite what you heard there ain't no money or future in the inner city hustling drugs. There is money in rapping nowadays so ironically many of them use drug tales to sell albums. In fact many of the artist have lyrics which were inspired by the tales relayed by AZ. The story's slant is a little skewed because it's a Rocafella film and Damon Dash had been giving AZ about 10,000 every 4 months during production according to Alpo. Thus the whole story is skewed based on AZ's account and makes him come out sort of angelic in the end. But don't be naïve in the deadly game of dope, there are no Angels. I was shocked and relieved to see that this film did not glorify the drug game. The story is basically Harlem folklore that has reached the big screen. It carries some nostalgia for older NY audiences but I don't think the movie is detailed or explanatory enough to carry over for a general audience not familiar with these ghetto superstars.

Eyecalone Says: Overall: B+

I just don't understand the American film industry. Despite critical acclaim The Quiet American has been less than promoted if not outright blacklisted. I only heard a little bit about it and saw it more or less on a fluke, and I guess that shouldn't be a surprise since it's only playing at about 2 theatres in a film market as large, and relatively open-minded, as New York City. To be honest the political undertones are quite subtle and really are not that easy to follow or interesting, unless you know something about the history of American and French colonial involvement in Southeast Asia. In fact most, people could sit through the entire film and completely miss the significance of the French-Vietnamese-American conflict occurring in the background. This is the second creation of this novel as a film, the first time was in 1958. I never saw the 1958 version but I hear that this one is significantly better. Despite what the synopsis says this film isn't much of a "murder mystery", but it definitely was a love story, featuring a love triangle.  Overall, The Quiet American, is a very solid film - not necessarily the type I normally go out of my way to see, but I had heard good things about it. I do recommend it but it is NOT FOR EVERYBODY! If you like "a little movie with your action" then this is not for you, and if you like your "romances" steamy then this movie is not for you. But if you like solid, realistic, and interesting movies with good dialogue, and don't mind hanging with the "old-school" crowd for an afternoon/evening, you might want to check this out. You'll probably have some problem finding where The Quiet American is playing, especially if you're outside L.A./NY/Chicago so here is the movie's official website http://www.miramax.com/quietamerican

Eyecalone Says: Overall: B-

The wonders of marketing. Yet another movie spawned by a video game, that makes money in it's own right, and will boost the video game's sales. Let me be the first to tell you, I am no big fan of horror movies (there is enough horror in the real world) however I decided to take one for the team and check this movie out. Taking everything into account I have to say I was mildly impressed. In all fairness there is only so much that can be done with a plot based on "Zombies". Resident Evil isn't spectacular, and if you're not familiar with the video game on which it was based (Resident Evil), then this movie is only a couple of steps up from a cheesy flick like Ghost of Mars. However, if you've seen or played the video game then this movie is kind of hot because the movie mirrors the game closely - and there are no happy endings (but it's definitely set up for a sequel). There aren't any big name actors playing roles in this movie but it is enjoyable and although it's a horror flick, it's not excessively gory. Most of the potentially goriest scenes are left to the imagination and you won't find yourself sucking your teeth about a bunch of unrealistic happenings. I'd suggest it for those familiar with the game but as for the rest of ya'll - I can't call it.

Ooh Papi Says: Overall: B-

If you're going to see this movie then be a good parent and DON'T bring anybody under 17. I thought it was good if you can get past the language because there is too much profanity and use of the n-word. I also didn't like the standup section he did about post-9/11 racial profiling (that shit ain't funny or cool, I could be mistaken for a person from the middle east, etc). Some people I know also said that Martin stole a few small bits of his routine from other famous black comedians, although personally I only recognized a small similarity with another comedians act in one of Martin's sections. On the positive side, there was some really funny stuff in here. Martin was really honest about his life, because as he put it; "nobody is immune from the trials and tribulations of life". From a humor standpoint, it started slow but the later sections when he talks about his stay in the hospital and problems with drug use (although he doesn't say which drugs) are had me crying. I was also especially able to identify with the section on a male perspective to child rearing/bearing. Overall I'd say check it out, but do it with other ADULTS!

Ooh Papi Says: Overall: C+

I waited on line for 2 hours expecting a action film but got a situation comedy. "Scorpion", a prequel to the financially successful Mummy movies, opened smaller than The Mummy and The Mummy Returns, the latter of which grossed $68.1 million in its first three days, thanks in part to The Rock's minor role. But both those movie sucked to all high hell as far as entertainment goes. In fact, Scorpion's opening numbers aren't that much greater than the $32.5 million Blade 2 racked up last month with only a FRACTION of the hype. Still, these figures ensure that The Rock and his arched eyebrow will be seen on the big screen again soon. Scorpion is well on its way to $100 million in domestic theaters. BUT once Spider-Man launches May 3, its a wrap cause this movie just is not good enough to keep it up. The ROCK is on the scene exuding charisma, and you have a real sista, named Isis, and the women warriors kicking ass - which my girl loved. But think about real history for one second, the Scorpion King, a southern pre-dynastic Egyptian, and the fact that the movie makes him an Akkadian (thus from Babylon and not Africa) with a half brother who is a full blooded Samoan or Hawaiian, (I forget the Chicano looking actors name) who teams up with a South Asian woman (just what geography miracle got her blown several thousand miles from home. Did the casting director, skip history... why not just throw in some Apache or Australians while they're at it and fuck up geography and history even more) to fight a Mesopotamian King (played by a guy who is 5'8 165 lbs, non threatening, looks he's from western Europe and is so skinny that you think crack was a B.C. invention). All good action films have great Villains, something this film lacks - my girl could kick the villain's ass but trust me it is funny. I was happy I was able to take the whole family cause the sex scene was implied not shown but my girl was desperately trying to see the Rock unclothed. He looks like me before the beer belly (lol). My kids loved it and so did my girl but neither care much about a storyline or decent dialogue , so I will be nice to this and give it a C+ but that's about it.

Eyecalone Says: Overall: C+

Please turn your brain to "low" before entering this film and take it for what it is. It's a simple action/comedy and nothing more. And yes it is fairly funny and definitely fun. Robert De Niro plays the normal De Niro character, which usually falls somewhere between a Gangster and a Cop, while Murphy's character is a nice contrast. On screen, De Niro and Murphy have good chemistry, which improves the film. There isn't much of a plot to give away and there aren't any significant underlying themes, but if you see it you should have fun - so long as you can ignore the heavy-shooting-heavier-missing "A-Team" shootouts and actions sequences.

Eyecalone Says: Overall: A

I'll admit, when I first saw the previews for this movie I wasn't very interested in seeing it, but after 2 trusted friends urged me to check it out I acquiesced. Boy am I glad I took their advice! Signs is like a 2002 War of the Worlds on the big screen, and it's just as scary. I've never really been frightened by the 'Jasons' and 'Michael Myers' of the movie world, but flicks like this give me goose bumps, and there is a good chance this flick will have you clawing your seat. But Signs is more than just top of the line suspense, director/producer/writer Night Shyamalan (who has a small part in the film) manages to add in some interesting concepts like faith, fate, and coincidence; and the sometimes thin line between them (If you've read the James Redfield's novel The Celestine Prophecy you'll probably like this movie). These issues are dealt with throughout the film as we follow the struggles of Graham Hess (Mel Gibson) as he attempts to deal with the death of his wife and life as he knew it, all set against the backdrop of a possible alien invasion. Another strong point was despite the engaging and serious subject matter the film still managed to add a lot of humor to lighten the tension. The weakest point in the movie was the special effects but you should have no problem overlooking them; this is Signs not Independence Day.

Gumby Dammitt Says: Overall: A

After years of being tied up in the treacherous web of court battle after court battle over which studio owned the rights to produce his "biopic", Marvel comics' flagship superhero is now a bonafide silver screen superstar. Take it from a cat who still makes his weekly shipping day pilgrimage to the local comic book shop, Marvel's past reputation for poor screen adaptations of their heroes is quickly becoming a thing of the past (thanks in most part to Wesley Snipes' Blade). From the moment the film opens, in fact, from the moment that the Marvel logo places on the screen I started to feel a little bit antsy in my seat. True to the comic book in virtually every way, everything came off right about this film. I'll be the first to admit that I wasn't instantly thrilled when I heard that Tobey Maguire was cast in the lead or when I read about the organic web-shooters in ole Spidey's forearms. But then Marvel released Ultimate Spiderman, which kinda updated the Spiderman mythos and brought in into the 21st century, which is where we find our movie. I realized after this film was over that there was nobody more fitting for the role of my personal favorite comic book hero than Maguire. There's a lot more involved in playing a complex character like Spiderman. The character is emotional by design and it was necessary to have a skilled actor portray Peter Parker. Cause you see, anybody could portray Spiderman, so long as they fit in the costume. But Tobey Maguire brought the sensitivity, believability and wide-eyed wonder to Parker's character that made the story go. I was impressed with the acting across the board (dude from Oz was a hoot as J. Jonah Jameson). The thing I was most impressed with was that the movie didn't sacrifice crucial story elements from the original tales told by Stan Lee and Steve Ditko to insert more action sequences into the film. The story was simply told. In fact, there are many scenes that were incorporated into the film that came straight from the comic books or the very covers themselves. Even those classic Spidey poses in mid-swing were magically worked into the film to bring the Amazing Fantasy of Spiderman to life. The effects used to bring Spidey to life were so top shelf, I found myself checking the skyline for that swinging red and blue figure swooping through the New York sky. I guess it was the 12-year-old in me! And I can't even mention how clever it was for Marvel and Universal to have a teaser trailer of The Incredible Hulk tag along with Spiderman to keep Marvel on the minds of the movie-going public. Finally, Spiderman has come to the Big Screen, and suddenly all seems right with the world. Warner Bros. and the folks at D.C. Comics had better get it together because finally, Marvel is here. Only thing left now is to count up those receipts.

Eyecalone Says: Overall: B-

One thing about Star Trek that has always amazed me and is so inexplicable that I now find it amusing, is the fact that the Captain and top officers of the ship regularly beam down to alien planets and hostile environments when there's trouble, not to mention that they consistently bring all types of unknown objects on to the ship. Talk about asking for trouble and equal opportunity employment. Note to future Star Trek ship Captains: If it beeps, has a skull and crossbones on it, glows, or is floating in space leave it where you found it! I've never been a big fan of Star Trek movies, although I've been watching the TV show since the Captain James T. Kirk and Mr. Spock days. It's not that the Star Trek movies were always bad, but something about them just didn't make me want to see them (and maybe I was broke some of those times too). That changed with the return of Star Trek to the big screen in Nemesis, which featured movie trailers and advertisements that, this time, sparked my interest. My high expectations weren't fully realized but the movie was good. The biggest problems for this film was that it was somewhat shallow. Captain Picard's nemesis, Shinzon who is actually a much younger clone of Picard, simply doesn't have a good enough reason to want to destroy the entire earth and the wickedness of the group of beings Shinzon leads does not match their hideous appearance. Nemesis is also lacking from a philosophical standpoint. Often Star Trek deals with more interesting and challenging issues beneath the surface, but this installment pans out more as an action film, as the theme of Nature Vs Nurture in human development gets somewhat lost. The film's marketers also showed some of the best action sequences of the movie in the commercials, which I think was a mistake (or maybe it wasn't since it got me in the theater). But overall Nemesis was an enjoyable movie and a good ride as we witness Captain Picard engaging in some less than expected combat tactics to save the earth, and maybe his crew.

Bruce Banner Says: Overall: B (B- if you're a Star Wars Fan)

First off let me say that this movie was SAVED by Yoda. He got busy for 5 minutes but it had the crowd charged for like 20. He had the audience going wild. I wanted to go out and get a Yoda shirt or some shit and I ain't no L-7. Otherwise the movie is unnecessarily busy, telling 3 ½ stories, and that love story shit was way too long and over developed to be intertwined. At times it killed the movie plus they had that corny ass soap opera love which to me was phony. I know people were in there thinking "just tell her you want to hit it dayum you only 17". Anyway it’s a prequel so there are certain people you realize have to survive like Obi Wan Kkenobi and Anakin Skywalker because he later becomes Darth Vader, which kills some possibilities. I was disappointed that Mace Windu (Sam Jackson) didn’t get more light saber action, especially cause he had the dope purple shit! (Yo nobody else had that - c'mon George Lucas u wasting dat Bad motherfucka’s action edge but props for dope special effects and only using theatres with digital surround sound to push the film higher on my scale). Ultimately the film started to feel too long which is a no-no in the realm of entertainment but then again I still wanted to be a Jedi after the movie until I realized that they get no punane. If Lucas would have cut down on the soapy love shit and that cry baby ass adolescent Anakin screen time, I might still want to be a Jedi.

Category: Drama

Rating: R for strong violence and sexuality, nonstop language, and drug content.

Run Time: 1 hr. 35 min.

Bruce Banter Says: Overall: F-

I was visiting NYC this week and my homeboy who I grew up with called me Tuesday (1/15/02) and told me to meet him at the corner of 42nd and 8th Avenue @ the AMC Theatre. I got to the AMC Theatre at 4:55pm and saw a crunked up crowd. Waiting to see the screening premiere of State Property. Inside the theater was a who's who of rap personalities, P-Diddy, Damon Dash, Jigga the whole Rocafella camp and other rappers were in the theatre. Dash goes on stage and gives shout outs to a few people in the packed theatre of "industry associates" with a beaming smile on his face like a proud father he introduces their film. Let me warn you this film has NO REDEEMING QUALITIES! As Rocafella's new Nemesis might say "Its Poison", No exaggeration. I can't respect it and I am going to spoil the plot for you in hopes that you wont pay to go see this 90 min Hollywood video. I didn't expect much but I try not to judge a book by its cover. I should have known what to expect, Dash had already said “filmmaking allows Roc-A-Fella to attach visuals to many of the stories depicted in its music. A lot of times we like to bring a lot of the rhymes that we say to life, because you might say it a little too quick and people will miss it. We try to bring the visual to it”. Usually a video is shot in a day, this was shot in a mere 2 weeks (over a span of 18 days), and it shows. More lesbian scenes than I can count, EVERY female in the movie is half naked and totally shallow or negative (whores, gold diggers, thug killa bitch, chicken headz). In a nutshell it's a regurgitated psuedo-Scarface from the hood story about Beanie Siegel who rises to riches in the fast-money game of drug dealing in his own community and killing up other black people on the screen. There is a whole lot of cursing, sex, nudity, and gunplay that's all. No character development, a marginal display of acting skills and imagery so reminiscent of Scarface that the writer should be sued for copyright infringement. A corny one liner follows every murder. The actors like Memphis Bleek don't even know how to hold guns the right way. Beanie curses every other line, if not every. There's no dialogue just 1 liners. One would think if somebody makes a movie they have enough of a story to tell that they don't have to keep "sampling" others stories, I guess they thought they were still in the studio. Beans (Beanie Siegel) and his crew, ABM, go on a mission to commit genocide against every other drug dealer in the city rolling up on the competition with mark ass lines like "get down or lay down" translation 'work with us or we kill you' usually they kill you. Then he runs into trouble when he tries to roll over Dame (Damon Dash) and Untouchable J (Jay Z). Dame kidnaps Beanies baby momma (blah, blah) and extort 500k from him (blah, curse, blah). He tries to get one of Dame's guys to betray them, (blah, blah) he won't so he shoots the guy (blah, curse, blah) but the guy lives and makes deal to testify for the state against Beans. They in a court room (blah, blah) he feels like he's going to get convicted, next scene shows so he and his boys shoot up the court room (blah, blah, kill, blah) then he is getting shot up and talking shit (like in Scarface) - they cut away and tell us that wasn't really what happened he only dreamed that, (in other words he dreamed of getting slaughtered like a pig). Then he says to the audience "but that was gangsta' right?" He then tells the audience he is actually doing something like 100 years in jail. The credits roll all the Ni#%az and bitches (sarcasm) start clapping , hoopin' and hollerin'. I get out of there hoping that ignorance is not contagious. Later that night I read Sigel, said his character (Beans) is a reflection of himself, "a young n---a in the streets, tired of hustlin', tired of slingin' and wants the world" I also realize that all the characters names are near identical to their actual names or real nicknames and it hits me that they really think they gangsters. Idiots all of em - Nuff Said

Eyecalone Says: Overall: B-

I came into this film with a mixture of high-expectations and uneasiness. I left feeling a little disappointed but less uncomfortable. The possibility of a nuclear holocaust is one that needs to be dealt with seriously in film, unfortunately in many areas Sum of All Fears fails to deliver. I was able to overlook the pseudo-patriotic post-9/11 undertones of this film, the acting was generally good, and it was entertaining, but the aftermath of the detonation of a nuclear bomb (even a small one) in a metropolitan area is not taken seriously enough. Simply put, Sum of All Fears was just a little to unrealistic to keep me smiling. In the immediate aftermath of a nuclear explosion people are using their cell phones and running around in the nuclear fallout haze in their summer clothes. In seems that in their haste to make certain things end happily the directors loose track of reality, not to mention that certain characters in the movie were close enough to the blast to have their cars, helicopters, and buildings trashed but somehow survived. The best points of the film are that it does deliver an anti-nuclear message (a message the could have been much stronger and salient) and this time the guilty party of terrorist are Fascist Neo-Nazis instead of the usual "anti-Arab" propaganda. Overall definitely worth seeing but, if you know a little something about atomic weapons or have a strong anti-nuclear weapon position, you will find this film far from profound.

Ooh Papi Says: Overall: D

After much early boredom things finally get rolling when Alexander lands several hundred millennia in the future. At this point in history, mankind has reverted back to a more primitive state. The inhabitants of a Manhattan-like jungle, include Alexander's love interest named Mara (Samantha Mumba), live in trees and frequently are forced to flee ghastly mutants who rise from the ground and carry on like radioactive WWF wrestlers which is pretty disturbing. There are plenty of violent, fast-paced chase scene that seems to have wandered over from a real action movie, and the creatures are genuinely scary. Things try to heat up when, Alexander journeys underground to battle Jeremy Irons' character, who chews the scenery and looks like a mix of Johnny Winter without his cowboy hat and the evil warlord from Dungeons and Dragons. Irons should seriously think about returning the Oscar he got earlier in his career, Reversal of Fortune indeed. Director Simon Wells - whose last film was the agreeable animated epic The Prince of Egypt - has never shot a live-action feature before, and it shows. He records scenes with very little flair or concern for momentum. You can't help wondering how more experienced directors would have handled the material. The various elements never mesh into a coherent whole; it's like watching a series of mediocre Star Trek episodes. Much like the main character, you find yourself repeatedly checking your watch and wondering where you are. Nothing in The Time Machine (which is rated PG-13) is unfit for kids, at least until the monsters show up. They're enough to make the hair stand up on the back of your neck, although at this point, so is Jeremy Irons. My kids usually like everything but now that this film came out, thats no longer true save your money for real.

Category: Action!!, Action/Adventure

Rating: PG-13 for (for violent sequences and some sensuality).

Run Time: 1 hr. 32 min.

Eyecalone Says: Overall: C-

As a Playahata, I have to tell the truth. I really thought this movie was going to be hot, (and most of you probably did too, don't act like ya'll didn't see the commercials!) but I was sadly disappointed. Don't get me wrong, this is far from the worst action film I have ever seen, but there were so many things wrong or that just didn't add up in this movie, I don't even know where to start. I thought the European scenery, accents, and fast cars would add a twist that spiced up the movie but in the end The Transporter measures up to an old Jackie Chan flick. But unlike some old Jackie Chan movies like Rumble in the Bronx the entertainment is not in the stunts and this movie is supposed to be taken seriously. If you stick around for the credits you will even notice that after about the 3rd person the characters don't even have names, instead it says stuff like 'thug 1', 'thug 2', 'bad guy 1', etc. The dialogue, character interaction, plot, (if you want to call that a plot) and acting are terrible, not to mention the leading lady, Yuen (Shu Qi), can hardly speak English! I'm all for multiculturalism but if you're going to be showing the movie in U.S. theaters and there are several verbal exchanges in Chinese, then how about some subtitles. Plus with Yuen's (Shu Qi) 13 word English vocabulary, I kept waiting for her to say "I Shu Qi, love you long time". I guess I should have expected this film not to hold together too well considering that the producer (Luc Besson) is French, the director (Cory Yuen) is from Hong Kong, and the leading man (Jason Statham) is British (and the soundtrack is dominated by rap music - hunh, whose idea was that?). One thing the film is big on is action! The film sets off with a high-speed car chase, followed by a shootout, and is filled with plenty of hand-to-hand, foot-to-head, fist-to-head, combat but even that is problematic since the film is edited in such a way that the fight scenes seem spliced together to make the fighting seem faster and exciting, but in actuality is hiding bad martial arts choreography. And what's up with the 'bad Asian dude' (see I don't know his name either, but he's the dad of Shu Qi's character in the movie), his face looks like it's coated with plastic and his hair appears stapled on - I was like, "I know this s.o.b. is not wearing a bad hairpiece in his feature film debut". I'd love to tell you something good about this movie but the best thing I could tell you is to save your doe - unless your 'money is long' or you are just that curious.

Eyecalone Says: Overall: C-

I'd hate to speak badly about Vin Diesel, because he seems like a really cool, down-to-earth guy, but who in Hollywood decided that this guy was going to be the next big thing? I have now seen Diesel in three movies and I have determined he is just not leading man material. Maybe the studios could hide his poor delivery of his lines, or the fact that he talks like the clay Sylvester Stallone from the Brisk iced tea Commercials, when he wasn't in front of the cameras all the time, but with him as the focal point I just wanted to step in and yell CUT! Even without Diesel's thespian difficulties, you're really going to have to put your brain in power-save mode before watching this one because this movie is dumb, predictable, and completely unbelievable. I mean there is usually some phony stuff in action flicks but some of this stuff is just hard to swallow. I don't know if it was the fact that Diesel's character, Xander "XXX" Cage learned how to shoot from playing video games; lacks military training but is un-phased by live ammunition and analyzes combat situations like a Green Beret; or the cigarette seeking/heat seeking missiles, but I just couldn't take this film seriously. Throw in some annoying patriotic propaganda, add water, stir, and add a tablespoon of predictable bad guy who is out to do what is seems all 'bad guys' are out to do lately: nearly destroy the world using biological/nuclear weapons often assembled by rogue Russian scientist (did these guys all go to the Dr. Evil University of Mayhem?). And that people is a recipe for a bad movie.

Starring: Mark Wahlberg, Thandie Newton, Tim Robbins, Christine Boisson, Stephen Dillane

Directed by Jonathan Demme

Produced by Edward Saxon, Ed Saxon, Jonathan Demme, Peter Saraf, Luc Besson

Written by Jonathan Demme, Jessica Bendinger, Peter Stone, Peter Joshua, Steve Schmidt

Distributed by Universal Pictures

Release Date: October 25, 2002

Synopsis: A young woman (Newton) in Paris is about to divorce her husband when she discovers... he's dead; and all their money is gone. She meets a mysterious man (Wahlberg), who tells her that the money was really his, and he wants it back, seemingly convinced that she's hiding the cash. Meanwhile, more people end up dead.

Ooh Papi Says: Overall: C-

Director Jonathan Demme must have been looking for something light & lively after Beloved (1998), but The Truth About Charlie is an oddball diversion indeed. Some think that he cast oddly cause he is secretly in love with Thandie Newton after directing her in Beloved. Some say that he loves to put her opposite young white males like Cruise and now Wahlberg. However this is not so. Newton actually prefers white males and Demme Actually, cast Will Smith for the role Wahlberg has which was originally played by the late great, Cary Grant in this 1963 remake of the film Charade.So in actuality Newton was replacing Hepburn and Will Smith Cary Grant But with Smith tied up making Ali, Demme went with Wahlberg after getting a strong recommendation from the Boogie Nights director. Demme has crafted the entire film with a handheld camera and frantic jump cuts, in the manner of some arty new-wave documentary, and he has cast Thandie Newton in the role once played by Audrey Hepburn, getting her to act not like a perky gamine in distress but a dour woman in peril. The convoluted cloak-and-dagger plot is now padded out to include the war in Sarajevo. Arriving in Paris, Newton discovers that her art-dealer husband -- the Charlie of the title -- has been mysteriously murdered. Wahlberg, in particular, gets lost in the byways of the film's hollow thriller maze. He doesn't shine and I DON'T say that because of all the recent news that he may be a stone cold racist. The trouble with The Truth About Charlie is that it really is after the truth about Charlie, a character we could hardly give a damn about. The only charade is the illusion that we might actually be entertained. The Truth About Charlie isn't incompetent, exactly, yet it would be hard to think of a recent movie that has worked this hard to achieve this little fun. It's not a brainteaser, but it's complicated. I prefer complex movies but this one, was simply not good.

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The Tuxedo Category: Action/Adventure and Comedy Rating: PG-13 for action violence, sexual content and language. Run Time: 1 hr. 36 min.

Starring: Jackie Chan, Jennifer Love Hewitt, Jason Isaacs, Ritchie Coster, Debi Mazar

Directed by Kevin Donovan

Produced by John H. Williams, Adam Schroeder, Walter F. Parkes, Brian Gersh

Written by Philip Hay, Matt Manfredi, Michael Wilson, Michael Leeson, Michael Wilson, Phil Hay

Distributed by Dreamworks

Release Date: September 27th, 2002 Nationwide

Synopsis: Cabbie-turned-chauffer Jimmy Tong (Jackie Chan) learns there is really only one rule when you work for playboy millionaire Clark Devlin (Jason Isaacs): Never touch Devlin's prized tuxedo. But when Devlin is temporarily put out of commission in an explosive "accident," Jimmy can't resist trying on the tux and soon discovers that this extraordinary suit may be more black belt than black tie. Suddenly thrust into a dangerous world of espionage, paired with a rookie partner (Jennifer Love Hewitt) even less experienced than he is, Jimmy becomes an unwitting - if impeccably dressed - secret agent.

Bruce Banter Says: Overall: C

Tony Stark could use this Tuxedo, that way he wouldn't have to change into that red and yellow thing (Marvel Fans hear me), and then we would have Max Devlin the original Tux owner who comes off kind of cool and serious meanwhile the new Tux, owner Jackie Chan, is comical and silly. This is one of those films that you see and the next day you can't remember any of the scenes or much about it. You just remember it had a lot of action, a lot of explosions and CGI stuff, with a soft plot. This film is on the borderline of comedy, sci-fi, and action film. For the 1st time ever Jackie Chan is not doing "his own stunts" but instead the CGI effects dominated the martial arts sequences, and when you have Jackie Chan the reigning master of karate action that is kind of a sham because anybody can be the "kick ass man" with computer generated effects. The dialogue is also mad corny but hey its an action film and at least they have a decent villain. It's kind of strange to have Jennifer Love Hewitt playing opposite Jackie Chan, and as an eventual love interest. It's also kind of awkward, but that part remains unfinished business, I just hope they don't try to finish the business with a part 2, but if you just want to see action and special effects and typical Jackie Chan this is the film for you - Nuff Said.

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The 25th Hour Category: Crime/Gangster and Drama Rating: R for strong language and some violence. Run Time: 2hr. 14min.

Starring: Edward Norton, Barry Pepper, Rosario Dawson, Philip Seymour, Brian Cox

Directed by Spike Lee

Produced by Julia Chasman, Jon Kilik, Spike Lee, Tobey Maguire, Nick Wechsler

Written by David Benioff

Distributed by Touchstone Pictures

Release Date: December 19th, 2002 (limited release)

Synopsis: This is the story of the last twenty four hours Monty Brogan (Norton) gets to spend with his two best friends, Frank (Pepper), a bonds trader, and Jakob (Hoffman), a high school English teacher, and his girlfriend, Naturelle (Dawson), before he goes to prison for seven years for pushing heroin, as they party the night away in New York City one last time.

Ooh Papi Says: Overall: C+

Let me say now, that I think Spike Lee is losing his edge, and this film moves slow which is starting to become a signature of post-1995 Spike Lee. Yes this film uses other Spike Lee signatures like stereotyping Puerto Ricans, especially our women. Other Signatures include the white character who yells out all his deep imbedded hatred and biases for ethnic groups right into the camera a la Do the Right thing. The room spinning around the person a la Mo Betta Blues and other Spike Lee films. Although you don't see Spike Lee even in a cameo in this film, you know it is one of his productions by the cinematography and overall film style etc. This film plays right into the hype that there is an abundance of gang rape going on in jail and it also makes you believe that whites don't have any protection networks set up in jail. Yeah right, I know this is false from a personal standpoint. It also asks you to believe that whites in NY who are Irish automatically receive enough sympathy from police and fire departments that they are able to just turn themselves into police after felony drug sentencing (They drive themselves to jail). I think this film will further entrench middle class white people's fears that jail is not somewhere for them. Unfortunately though, it will do a few other things, it will not move fast, it will not present enough stimulating dialogue, it will not convince you that Tony Siragusa is Ukrainian and not Italian and it will not convince me that Rosaria Dawson did not have sex with Spike Lee back in the days. Depending on your maturity level and age you may fall asleep on this.

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Lord of the Rings 2: The Two Towers Category: Action/Adventure, Science Fiction/Fantasy and Drama Rating: PG-13 for epic battle sequences and scary images. Run Time: 2 hr. 59 min.

Starring: Elijah Wood, Sean Astin, Viggo Mortensen, Ian McKellen, Christopher Lee

Directed by Peter Jackson

Produced by Fran Walsh, Barrie M. Osborne, Peter Jackson, Tim Sanders

Written by Philippa Boyens, Fran Walsh, Peter Jackson, Phillippa Boyens, Stephen Sinclair

Distributed by New Line Cinema

Release Date: December 18th, 2002

Synopsis: The second chapter in the J.R.R. Tolkien saga, the hobbits Frodo and Sam brave terrible dangers in an attempt to have the evil ring destroyed, while Aragorn, Legolas and their allies strive to rescue the abducted hobbits Pippin and Merry from the clutches of evil. The great wizard Gandalf also makes his miraculous return to aid in the struggle against the united towers of Saruman and Sauron.

Gumby Dammitt Says: Overall: A

Well it’s been a year since the Fellowship was founded and the journey to destroy the evil Sauron’s Ring was undertaken by Frodo and company. And let’s face it, you people have been looking forward to The Two Towers as much as any so called “geek”. The second installment in J.R.R. Tolkien’s saga of middle earth jumps off right into things and builds into a great epic adventure. But you probably already knew that. I know it probably sounds corny, and I’m wincing as I type this, but this movie is everything that the first one was but bigger. The Two Towers contains bigger action and bigger peril for our hirsute-footed ring-bearer. Aragorn, Legolas and company are back as heroic and daring as ever. We meet the gangly twisted figure of Gollum, whose mind and body have been twisted by his obscene lust for the ring of power. Outstandingly rendered through the magic of current CGI technology; Gollum comes to life in a frighteningly realistic and disturbing manner. Both psychotic and childlike, Gollum delivers the performance of the film in wonderfully schizophrenic fashion. Hell, he should get a nod for Best Actor! Aside from the treat that is Gollum the heart of this film, the battle of Helm’s Deep is a fantastic and massive medieval brouhaha that captures the manner in which castles and such were attacked and overwhelmed by outside forces way back when. I mean, whatcha gon’ do when ten thousand snarling Orcs come knockin' atcha door? The Two Towers has it all. Trust me, if you enjoyed the Fellowship Of The Ring, you are in for a real treat when you take this trip. And I didn’t even mention the guardians of the forests, the Ents. Oh, you don’t know what an Ent is? Hack down a tree, you’ll find out. Okay, okay, so I know it’s not real, and it’s all a massive fantasy, but in these times a little escapism is just what the doctor ordered. And again, I can’t say enough about the expertly applied digital effects, which bring Gollum, the massive Ents and much more "screamingly" to life. I bid you all to ride out and catch this epic tale of fantasy. Sound Helm’s Horn! The Two Towers is guaranteed to make fantasy fans of all who see it.

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Undercover Brother Category: Comedy Rating: PG-13 for language, sexual humor, drug content and campy violence. Run Time: 1 hr. 23 min.

Starring: Eddie Griffin, Aunjanue Ellis, Dave Chappelle, Denise Richards, Chris Kattan

Directed by Malcolm D Lee

Produced by Brian Grazer, Michael Jenkinson, Damon Lee

Written by John Ridley, Michael McCullers, Salanini Patterson

Distributed by Universal Pictures

Release Date: May 31, 2002 Nationwide.

Synopsis: Directed by Malcolm D.Lee (The Best Man) and starring Eddie Griffin (Double Take), Undercover Brother is a live-action comedy based on Urban Media's popular website series. Blasted from the past and ready to take care of business, Undercover Brother is recruited to infiltrate a sinister underground movement headed by The Man. Partnered with the sassy, stunning Sistah Girl (Aunjanue Ellis), our hero must first undergo the ultimate attitude adjustment and trade in his 'fro and platforms for tennis sweaters and penny loafers. Once the transformation is complete, he's ready to take on the evil perpetrators of Operation Whitewash - Mr. Feather (Chris Kattan), Penelope Snow aka White She Devil (Denise Richards) and ultimately, The Man.

Bruce Banter Says: Overall: C+

This film deviates from its original creation on the internet at www.urbanentertainment.com. I told subscribers to the Playahata newsletter about this site in my broadband review about 9 months ago. http://www.geocities.com/the_playahata/Bruce_Broadband_Review.html . So I was not surprised at the type of I'm Gonna get you Sucka with the Maxwell Smart/Inspector Gadget/Austin Powers flavor. However its 2002, so technology is employed, ala "Romeo Must Die and Matrix" special effects for the action scenes. I consider my self from da old school so the soundtrack really appealed to me. It was off da hook, using mad classic soul songs and a few clips from the 70's black exploitation films including my favorite Jim Kelley vs The Hand Man scene. There is some nostalgia at its best in here. Overall I like satire and parody films because they aim to show us how ridiculous the images we export are. This film uses spoof comedy instead of drama otherwise it could be like Bamboozled. However its not that clever and its somewhat predictable even for satire. What probably surprises the most is what doesn't happen, I knew for sure that the main villain who secretly loved inner city Black Culture was going to turn out to be somebody who was passing for white but was really black (too bad). Undercover Brother's biggest problem is that it plays to stereotypes in ways that are supportive sort of them by their analogies. So we still get left holding the bag in the end. The supporting Characters "Smart Brother" had to be fat, clumsy with glasses (thus our kids still won't want to identify w/being smart) and "Conspiracy Bother" was the Black Nationalist/Political Brotha with the I hate Whitey syndrome who was usually predictable. This is so tired. The white critics are loving this flic, that usually tells me something. Anuja Elis who plays "Sistah Girl" is probably the real hero in this film, she's dope, smart, sassy and fine but the subtle thing is that the HERO (Undercova Brother) still wants da white girl. (How's that for an insult to injury ) Denise Richards plays the white girl Penelope Snow aka White She Devil aka Black Man's Kryptonite (the last moniker is an ultimate diss title to all of us IMHO). I don't have Jungle fever or even a forest cold but I know a sexy white chick when I see one & she is that, but she can't touch the actress who plays her rival "Sistah girl". For instance, they intentionally shot Snow, in slow-mo and sexier poses on screen so that the men in the theatre are secretly thinking in their mid "damn I wanna hit that". In fact the film/photo editors purposely made her butt in the movie ads, bigger than it really is. In essence A black butt on a white chic and I think she already had the collagen shots in her lips to make them bigger (not confirmed). In the end the hero chooses the sistah over the white gal as his love interest but its almost like he only does it out of principle not authentic DESIRE, yet ALL the brothas desire Snow ... conspiracy brotha', smart brotha', the chief .. I know its over the top comedy but damn leave somebody out. Many of us want wives and lovers that look like our mother and sisters. Its an insult to sistahs that doesn't sit well with me in the end. Its ironic one day "hollyweird" is air brushing the Latin ass of Jay Lo's claiming its too ethnic and needed to be smaller and the next day they are increasing Denise Richards posterior measurements to make her more appealing. Most people left out the theatre once the credits start but the film isn't over so stay back and see the last scenes, while the classics music pumps and learn that our hero had still made a date to hook up with the Penelope Snow. In the sequel don't be surprised if she gets him.

Bitter Bitch Says: Overall: C

I read Bruce Banter's review first, and was so glad to see that I wasn't trippin' while I watched the movie. I thought maybe I was being too cynical and sensitive in the portrayal that ALL men desire white women. It seemed that U/B only marginally desired "Sistah Girl" once he encountered, White She Devil.

The depiction of "Sistah Girl" as brooding, sassy, and angry was no surprise to me, nor was Penelope's more "pleasant" disposition. It was apparent to me that you could be certain when and who She Devil was actually working for because of her umm I'll be nice and say "craftiness". This fact alone SPOKE VOLUMES TO ME, but I wont' belabor this point or I'll have to endure "The opinion of the contributors for the Playahatas does not reflect that of management" or some similar statement, so I'll leave it alone but feel free to get at me one on one if you want me to break it down.

The stereotypes were over the top but I laughed my ass off most of the time. At times, I was the only person laughing especially when Penelope Snow was referred to as "White She Devil" - apparently I was the only one in an entire theatre that saw the comedy and irony in that remark (go figure).

At any rate - disgusting stereotypes aside - I can honestly say it was funny, although the negative images were grossly magnified. I would never say that it was a good movie, only Pootie Tang was worse in terms of stereotypes but I laughed at Pootie Tang too. I came away wondering what types of opinions a person from another country would form about each race. If I were from another country - I would believe that blacks were an angry, jealous, comical, dim-witted race. Meanwhile whites would be considered as crafty, coveted, and superior.

On a deeper level, I am not surprised by the messages conveyed by this movie. It is popular opinion that black women are mean spirited, bitter, and threatened by white women. The perfect twist on the movie would have been for The Man and Lance to be equally attracted to and captivated by "Sistah Girl". To me, this would have been just as accurate. It is also no secret that our contribution to society is imbedded in every fiber of the country. Our influence, style, mode of dress, and language is understood by most because it has become mainstream and America continues to capitalize on it. Understanding the dynamic that what we (Blacks) do is first publicly criticized, then capitalized upon is common knowledge and has been practiced damn near since we got here.

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Undisputed Category: Action/Adventure Rating: R for Strong Language. Run Time: 1 hr. 31 min.

Starring: Ving Rhames, Wesley Snipes, Peter Falk, Fisher Stevens, Ed Lover

Directed by Walter Hill

Produced by Andrew Sugarman, Walter Hill, David Giler, Brad Krevoy, Andrew Sugerman

Written by Walter Hill, David Giler

Distributed by Miramax

Release Date: August 23rd, 2002 (1,200 theaters).

Synopsis: James "Iceman" Chambers (Rhames), the heavyweight boxing champ, falsely convicted of rape, is sentenced to prison, where an old-time gangster (Falk) arranges a bout between Chambers and the Undisputed prison champ, Monroe Hutchen (Snipes).

Bruce Banner Says: Overall: C+

This week I saw Penitentiary meets Rocky III except they called it Undisputed. This film is phony but it's good entertainment. The character Ving Rhames plays (George Iceman Chambers) has a life similar to Mike Tyson and he seems tough but this is an Ahmen-Ra production, so you gotta know Wesley's gonna kick his ass in the end. Especially as cocky as he is, you know even in a jail story somebody has to be good and somebody bad. This film has a few seemingly transplanted past boxing characters, Peter Falk is like Mickey Rourke (ROCKY) on lock down. Ed Lover is comic relief but he is not too funny, he is aiight however the problem is he is talking too loud and fast and therefore you miss most of his attempts at jokes. He brought too much of his past gig with him, I forget what pseudo Boxing event he used to host but he was loud and wild in that and didn't act much different in this film. Ving and Wesley together on the screen hold this movie down enough to give it a nod, but you won't nod too much cause overall the soundtrack is weak. In addition having Master P and the "No limit" folks in the film was nothing more than a distraction. If they wanted people who could rap and kick hard core lyrics then they should have had cameo's by the Lifers Group. It is a little short but the film flows without interruption although it's too unbelievable to be ingested as a real drama. Last but not least since both boxers are in jail for violence against women, they could have lengthened this flick to insert a social message about domestic violence or violence against women instead of it being a neutral issue.

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